After I finished reading Moranthology, I had all sorts of questions about Caitlin Moran. There are just enough details about her life in that collection of articles – about her childhood, her husband, her teen years as a wunderkind journalist – to make me want to know more. Her memoir, How To Be a Woman, happily answers all of those questions and proves that she can be just as entertaining a memoirist as she is a columnist.
The memoir is framed around various experiences in Moran’s life that have helped to define (for her) what it means to be a woman. She discusses with her usual humour her first period, her overweight youth, her first encounter with sexism in the workplace (which she handles with impressive bravado), her marriage, her experiences with childbirth and abortion, and her opinions on those hot button issues that allow outraged responses from a good proportion of readers (topics like the porn industry, modern standards towards body hair, how female celebrities are treated in the media, etc). Moran is never short on opinions and, whether you agree with her or not, she is always entertaining in her arguments.
Admittedly, I only agreed with her opinions about 50% of the time but this is not meant to be a general guide to others on how to be a woman: this is a book about Moran and how she, over the course of more than twenty years, tried to figure out what it meant for her. Does every woman’s path to becoming a woman include the contemplation of what to call their genitals? God, I hope not. But that doesn’t mean they can’t appreciate other lessons Moran learned along the way.
For me, the chapters on “Why You Should Have Children”, “Why You Shouldn’t Have Children” and “Abortion” were the most interesting. They felt more sincere and less jokey than other sections of the book and I found Moran’s account of her abortion very powerful, both in her description of the physical process and in her analysis of how uncertain society is around women (especially ones who are already mothers) who do not weep with despair when they choose to terminate a pregnancy. There was certainly no weeping for Moran:
I can honestly say that my abortion was one of the least difficult decisions of my life. I’m not being flippant when I say it took me longer to decide what worktops to have in the kitchen than whether I was prepared to spend the rest of my life being responsible for a further human being, because I knew that to do it again – to commit my life to another person – might very possibly stretch my abilities, and conception of who I am, and who I want to be, and what I want and need to do – to breaking point. The idea that I might not – in an earlier era, or a different country – have a choice in the matter, seems both emotionally and physically barbaric.
The most attractive thing about this book is how self-aware Moran is and how good natured she is about making fun of her younger self. There is nothing so insufferable as a writer who cannot recognize how insufferable they are (or, hopefully, were). Moran handles some weighty subjects in a humourous and thoughtful way, making this book a pleasure to read.
Hi Claire – we’re neck-and-neck on this title – not that it’s a race – heaven forbid! – but I too was very curious about Caitlin Moran after reading “Moranthology” (my interest piqued by your review), and I too have just finished “How to Be a Woman”. Trying to formulate my own review, and at a bit of a loss on what to say about it, and how to say it, and what to include.
I thoroughly enjoyed reading it, but it’s definitely outspoken in a “spare no details” sort of way, which I am hoping to be able to get across to those contemplating reading the book, but without putting them off. There’s a definite “ick” factor going on here! (The episode with the dog and the … you know!)
As usual, you’ve managed to say things ever so well. Great review! 🙂
Hope you’re able to review it faster than I was – it took me several weeks! There are so many extremely detailed reviews out there about this book, treating it very seriously indeed, while for me it was fun and though-provoking at times but nothing really stood out about it.
I think the “spare no details” approach is the best thing about this book. Moran doesn’t veil discussions with coy codenames. She is brash and bold and it is a refreshing change from some of the more timid styles of other writers approaching feminist topics. I know Moran’s writing doesn’t appeal to everyone but I love that there is something this frank on the market. The dog bit didn’t really bother me but I was put off by a few other moments; still, I think those moments are necessary for the kind of book this is.
I’d considered reading this book because it sounded full of interesting topics, but then hearing about some of the uhh, more intimate details of it, I wasn’t so sure. I do like that she discusses what’s good and bad about having kids though. I’m still torn on that topic (although leaning towards not having them) and it’s rare to find someone who can just discuss both sides without trying to be judgy or tell you what to do.
The intimate details are what make this book so interesting! Moran doesn’t hold anything back and, yes, that means her descriptions can be embarassing and disgusting and potentially offensive but they are very powerful because of that.
My favourite quote from your review:
‘Does every woman’s path to becoming a woman include the contemplation of what to call their genitals? God, I hope not.’
I saw Moran on a British talk show discussing feminism, and she was very outspoken about pubic hair and how the lack of it was ‘boring.’ I must admit that her frankness on the topic was refreshing even if, like you say, I don’t always agree with her views. I respect her for going there, for voicing her thoughts on subjects about which we all have opinions yet rarely discuss.
But after your rave reviews and Simon granting her the illustrious title of 21st-century Dickens, Moran is going to the top of my wish list. No more procrastination! 🙂
It is rare that I ever find someone I agree with 100% and I find that it is in reading authors who I disagree with that I am able to better define my own views. As much fun as I have reading Moran, I love the points where I disagree with her because I come away knowing myself that much better. The pubic hair discussion is interesting – especially when paired/contrasted with her views on other body hair. I love that she talks so frankly about subjects that other writers still consider either taboo or very, very serious. Can’t wait to hear what you think of her!
Update: I just bought ‘How To Be a Woman’ last night. I stopped by the bookstore to pick up a gift and couldn’t resist purchasing a little present for myself as well. I probably won’t be able to properly dig in until next week, but I’ve already had a peek and it’s quite amusing. I can’t wait to read more!
Re the abortion: it’s too bad she didn’t try to stretch her abilities, as she puts it. In earlier eras, one did come to know oneself, within the limited opportunities of one’s environment, however barbaric that may seem to contemporary standards. I also wonder why intelligent women like Moran have “unplanned” pregnancies. I know, I know: accidents can happen, but most women actually seem to be able to avoid them. There are so many other smart women out there to pay attention to; frankly, I don’t get why one would bother with Moran.
Does not sound like this is the book for you, Elizabeth!
Claire, I am glad to read this review. I thought “How to Be a Woman” was just more of Ms. Moran’s essays/columns on popular culture (“Moranthology”) and was not going to read it. Now that I see that it is about her, I think I will add it to my list. Thanks.
Wonderful, Belle! Glad I was able to bring this to your attention.
I think the most thought-provoking chapter for me personally was the abortion one. Though I think my own decision would have been very different, I completely *get* why she decided what she did, though I didn’t particularly admire Moran at that moment. Career over child, and all that judgemental stuff, you know. And the deep moral issues this whole thing raises, which Moran sort of just skates right over. But her reporting of the actual procedure is just as frank as the rest of her saga, and that in itself is rather admirable – what a difficult thing this is to discuss, in any venue, and how absolutely polarizing it is, and how unpredictable are people’s responses!
Just throwing this out there, in support of Moran’s “full disclosure”, regarding her discussion of new motherhood in general. One thing about myself that shocked me, while going through the infinitely draining short-but-seemingly-endless years of mothering young babies, was how I suddenly had an understanding of mothers who snapped and either injured (ie. shaken baby) or killed their own offspring. I personally never came close to either, but I suddenly saw how one *could*. Moran puts these sorts of thoughts into words, and what a rare and important thing that is.
These occasional serious thoughts aside, the vast majority of the book is basically just a personal soapbox, very readable and very funny, but essentially just One Person’s Take. I agreed with Moran frequently, but her story is unique, as is every person’s; it’s not a universal blueprint for thought or behaviour, much as it’s touted to be a “feminist manifesto”. (Though there’s something in that…)
Must get my own review hashed out! The really short take: I liked this book.
For me, the reasoning behind her abortion didn’t seem to have as much to do with career over child as it did with her general quality of life. I thought it wasn’t that she necessarily wanted to work more and thought a third child would distract from that: it was that she was very happy with her life as it was. And as for the “deep moral issues”, I think that is exactly what she is addressing when she talks about how discussions about abortion are usually framed and how society thinks women should feel and fret whenever they are contemplating them. For some people, it is absolutely a heart-wrenching decision that causes them untold hours of moral questioning. For others, the answer is more easily come by. It is a very personal decision and everyone is going to approach it in their own way.
Can’t wait to read your review!
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[…] now, ever since finishing the book, and since reading fellow blogger Claire’s take over on Captive Reader – How to Be a Woman . What I’ve decided is to not really say all that much about this one. The internet is crowded […]
This paragraph of yours encourages me, Claire:
‘Admittedly, I only agreed with her opinions about 50% of the time but this is not meant to be a general guide to others on how to be a woman: this is a book about Moran and how she, over the course of more than twenty years, tried to figure out what it meant for her.’
I was worried that the book would be laying down the law as “You must be liberal etc. to be a proper woman”, which is just as bad as “You must be conservative etc.” If she’s just describing her own interpretation, it’s not so strident.
From what you quote, I already know that I’m going to disagree with her strongly, but I’m still looking forward to reading it.
I can’t wait to hear your take on this one, Simon! Both as a male and someone who is definitely going to disagree with Moran on a number of points. Still, I hope you have as much fun reading it as I did!
[…] by Caitlin Moran – I’ve really enjoyed Moran’s two other books (Moranthology and How To Be a Woman) and am very excited to read this, her debut (autobiographical) […]