Adaptations, be they for the stage or screen, of favourite books are tricky things. In the hands of a bad writer, the results can be horrifying. But in the hands of a good writer who loves the source material as much as his intended audience, the final product can be magical. Case in point: Toad of Toad Hall by A.A. Milne, a stage adaptation of Kenneth Grahame’s beloved The Wind in the Willows from 1929.
I was pretty confident going into my reading of the play that Milne would not disappoint. He seldom does and the fact that this is really the only one of his plays still regularly performed seemed promising. By focusing on the exploits of Toad, somewhat at the expense of the other characters, he doesn’t quite capture the spirit of the book but he still comes out with a product that is delightfully entertaining and which entirely lives up to magnificent of Toad. Indeed, it seems entirely natural to have Milne’s recognizable dialogue coming out of Toad’s mouth; they are a perfect match.
There was a moment of panic for me very early on in the play when I saw that Milne had changed Rat’s most famous, most quotable remark on the joys of boats to a much more generalised statement about the pleasures of river-side living:
There is nothing – absolute nothing – half so much worth doing as simply messing about by a river.
How could he do that? How dare he? But I was willing to overlook this travesty – if Kenneth Grahame could, then so could I – and the rest of the play was a joy.
The other animals that I love so much in the books are paid scant attention here. The wonderful relationship between Rat and Mole is barely touched on and Badger – oh, what Milne has done to Badger! Instead of the gentle but stern paternal figure I love so much in the book, here he is presented as a doddering old man, more interfering than guiding. As he despairs over Toad’s recklessness (“Alack! Alack! O, hapless Toad! O, ill-fated animal…I knew his father, I knew his grandfather, I knew his uncle, the Archdeacon”) he loses all the authority with which Graham invested him. He has great comedic value but he is not my Badger. Instead, he seems rather like Mr. Woodhouse, happiest when allowed to moan about the ills of the world and lament the dangerous behaviour of others. His attempts to help Toad don’t seem to reflect any legitimate concern or affection for that poor misguided creature, just a feeling that he owes it to Toad’s ancestors. It works very well but the change in characterization takes a bit of time to get used to.
Toad of Toad Hall, as the title suggests, focuses on the Toad-centred episodes from The Wind in the Willows. One of the cleverest things Milne does is incorporate Toad’s story into scenes where he hadn’t originally played a part. In the book, when Mole finds himself lost in the Wild Wood, his fear comes more from the strangeness of his surroundings than from any visible threat. But here, Milne installs a chorus of ferrets, weasels and stoats – the fearsome residents of the Wild Wood – who emerge from the darkness to sing their hatred of Toad. Their vicious curses and rhythmic chant of “Down with Toad” give a much more immediate sense of terror and, as far as the narrative is concerned, successfully establish our villains. It is a brilliant addition and I can only imagine how effective it must be when staged.
The highlight of the play has to be the lengthy courtroom scene, where Toad is brought to justice for his reckless behaviour. Here Milne gets creative, creating new dialogue and characters, and the result is delightfully entertaining. It is also the scene that proves just how wonderfully suited Toad is to Milne’s clever and flippant dialogue. On being accused on insulting a police offer by calling him “fat-face”, Toad is all innocence in a speech only Milne could have written:
TOAD. I didn’t mean him any more than any one else. I just murmured the expression to myself. It’s a way I have. I’m that sort of person. I murmur things to myself. It’s the result of a highly strung temperament and an artistic nature.
But, of course, Toad’s contrition vanishes the moment the sentence comes down and his arrogance – the thing that has most attracted readers to him for all these years – returns:
JUDGE. Any last words or valedictory utterances?
TOAD (boldly). Yes.
JUDGE (kindly). Well, well, what is it?
TOAD. Fat-face!
JUDGE (aghast) Fat-face? ME?
TOAD (wildly). All of you! All the whole lot of you! All fat-faces! I am Toad, the Terror of the Highway, Toad, the traffic-queller, the Lord of the Lone Trail, before whom all must vie way or be smitten into nothingness and everlasting night. I am the Toad, the handsome, the popular, the successful Toad. And what are you? Just fat-faces.
Oh, Toad.
Part of the fun of reading adaptations is admiring (or, in less successful cases, critiquing) how they are done. By choosing to centre the story on Toad, Milne sacrificed the more subtle elements of The Wind in the Willows but, given how difficult it would be to do justice to them, it seems a clever choice. He certainly succeeded in creating an entertaining comedy about the exploits of Toad and I can only imagine how fun it must be to see this show performed.